en de jongen die me die verteld had vertelde me ook deze:
Steun giro 666, hoe meer geld we binnenkrijgen, hoe hoger de vloedgolf of Marokko!
Het veel te slechte moppen topic
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marco
- Sheriff of the Posbank
- Berichten: 23448
- Lid geworden op: 25 feb 2007, 16:56
- Locatie: in the-middle-of-nowhere-noord-holland : Edam
Een boerenknecht rijdt met zijn jeep over het land om de afsluitingen te controleren. Na een paar minuten belt hij met zijn gsm de boer op en zegt:
"Boer, ik heb een probleem. Ik heb onderweg een zwaan aangereden en nu zit die vast in de grill van mijn jeep. Het spartelt zo hard dat ik het er niet uitkrijg. Wat moet ik doen?"
"Achterin de jeep ligt een jachtgeweer", zegt de boer, "schiet het af en wanneer het niet meer spartelt trek je het los en gooi je het maar ergens in de bosjes."
"Oke", zegt de knecht en hij haakt in.
Tien minuten later belt hij echter terug naar de boer en zegt:
"Boer, ik deed wat je gezegd hebt, ik heb het afgeschoten, losgetrokken en in de kant gesmeten."
"Wat is het probleem dan nu weer?" snauwt de boer.
"Het blauwe licht op zijn moto blijft flikkeren!"
"Boer, ik heb een probleem. Ik heb onderweg een zwaan aangereden en nu zit die vast in de grill van mijn jeep. Het spartelt zo hard dat ik het er niet uitkrijg. Wat moet ik doen?"
"Achterin de jeep ligt een jachtgeweer", zegt de boer, "schiet het af en wanneer het niet meer spartelt trek je het los en gooi je het maar ergens in de bosjes."
"Oke", zegt de knecht en hij haakt in.
Tien minuten later belt hij echter terug naar de boer en zegt:
"Boer, ik deed wat je gezegd hebt, ik heb het afgeschoten, losgetrokken en in de kant gesmeten."
"Wat is het probleem dan nu weer?" snauwt de boer.
"Het blauwe licht op zijn moto blijft flikkeren!"
Yamaha Sheriff 1981
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Tombo
- 17500km gereden
- Berichten: 18365
- Lid geworden op: 12 jun 2006, 08:52
- Locatie: Achterhoek
Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night.
They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.
The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.
Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'
'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire.
There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he re-focused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.
'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied,
'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.'
They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.
The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.
Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'
'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire.
There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he re-focused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.
'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied,
'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.'
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Laars
- 2500km gereden
- Berichten: 3738
- Lid geworden op: 11 jan 2008, 14:20
- Locatie: Dordrecht
Tombo schreef:Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night.
They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.
The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.
Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'
'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire.
There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he re-focused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.
'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied,
'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.'
Speciaal in het engels vanwege het steeds groter wordende internationale karakter van de site
1978 chroom 60 cc
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marco
- Sheriff of the Posbank
- Berichten: 23448
- Lid geworden op: 25 feb 2007, 16:56
- Locatie: in the-middle-of-nowhere-noord-holland : Edam
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mpro09
- 10000km gereden
- Berichten: 14285
- Lid geworden op: 10 nov 2006, 15:31
- Locatie: Hilversum
- Contacteer:
Tombo schreef:Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night.
They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.
The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.
Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'
'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire.
There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he re-focused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.
'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied,
'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.'
whahahaha
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Pipedown
- 2000km gereden
- Berichten: 2110
- Lid geworden op: 26 mei 2007, 11:51
- Locatie: St.Maarten
- Contacteer:
-
Camiel
- 5000km gereden
- Berichten: 5485
- Lid geworden op: 06 jul 2009, 17:44
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phoebeer
- 1000km gereden
- Berichten: 1042
- Lid geworden op: 05 jul 2008, 20:53
- Locatie: hengelo
- Contacteer:
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Jens36
- 5000km gereden
- Berichten: 6140
- Lid geworden op: 11 apr 2010, 20:14
- Locatie: Mechelen
phoebeer schreef:Camiel schreef:Pipedown schreef:marco schreef:Ben net bezig om de kerstverlichting op te hangen.
Ze doen mij denken aan allochtonen.
Meer dan de helft werkt niet, ze zijn allemaal met elkaar verbonden, maar ze zijn toch echt het mooist als ze in een boom hangen !!!!!
jij snaptem
Ik snap hem ook
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Wimmel O
- 1000km gereden
- Berichten: 1072
- Lid geworden op: 14 mar 2009, 17:15
- Locatie: Kerkdriel
jensje36 schreef:phoebeer schreef:Camiel schreef:Pipedown schreef:marco schreef:Ben net bezig om de kerstverlichting op te hangen.
Ze doen mij denken aan allochtonen.
Meer dan de helft werkt niet, ze zijn allemaal met elkaar verbonden, maar ze zijn toch echt het mooist als ze in een boom hangen !!!!!
Ik snap hem ook
wa zijn we weer lekker kort door de bocht allemaal
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marco
- Sheriff of the Posbank
- Berichten: 23448
- Lid geworden op: 25 feb 2007, 16:56
- Locatie: in the-middle-of-nowhere-noord-holland : Edam
Een jonge knappe vrouw komt op een avond later thuis, en laat aan haar man een schitterende parelring zien.
"Kijk eens schat hoe mooi! Mijn baas en ik spelen samen in de lotto en vandaag hebben we een flinke prijs gewonnen.
Toen heeft hij die ring voor mij gekocht."
Twee weken later komt ze weer laat thuis en laat stralend haar nieuwe bontjas zien.
"Lieverd, we hebben weer stevig met de lotto gewonnen, daar heeft hij vandaag deze nerts voor gekocht."
Omdat ze moe is vraagt ze haar man of hij het bad wil laten vollopen.
Dat doet hij, want hij doet alles voor zijn vrouw.
Even later roept hij: "Schat je bad is klaar!"
Ze komt de badkamer binnen en zegt verbaasd: "Maar schat, de bodem van het bad staat net onder water."
"Natuurlijk liefje," antwoordt hij, "anders word je lottoformulier nat."
"Kijk eens schat hoe mooi! Mijn baas en ik spelen samen in de lotto en vandaag hebben we een flinke prijs gewonnen.
Toen heeft hij die ring voor mij gekocht."
Twee weken later komt ze weer laat thuis en laat stralend haar nieuwe bontjas zien.
"Lieverd, we hebben weer stevig met de lotto gewonnen, daar heeft hij vandaag deze nerts voor gekocht."
Omdat ze moe is vraagt ze haar man of hij het bad wil laten vollopen.
Dat doet hij, want hij doet alles voor zijn vrouw.
Even later roept hij: "Schat je bad is klaar!"
Ze komt de badkamer binnen en zegt verbaasd: "Maar schat, de bodem van het bad staat net onder water."
"Natuurlijk liefje," antwoordt hij, "anders word je lottoformulier nat."
Yamaha Sheriff 1981